Sonnet of trepidation


I am riveted by a frenzy of words

Madness clutter, echoes of ghosts

This provocation of stirring cruelty

Oppressive noise booming in my psyche

Burdened by sleep deprivation

My fingers shiver, and there is fear

Of dangerous roads and uncertainty

And the beast, obscenity of my chaos

Devouring me whole as I scratch within its belly

I see the people around me as fluttering apparitions

Mouths moving like fish out of water

Dissolving into a miasma of joylessness

I have no patience, rage fire in my gut

I want to hate them,

But the truth is I feel lonely next to them

The crescendo of my anomaly

Enthralled by this agitator

As I begin to love myself cruelly

I dislike what I see of me

Savage demon cacophony

They speak of onyx storms

Grotesque through my critical eye

I want to shatter mirrors,

Transform my conviction

Manifest into skin and bone

I move with high intensity

Step up, step down, faster




Brush the sweat from my brow

I recalibrate my senses into electric adrenaline

I am not dying yet, although it feels like it,

Merely my heart is becoming lighter

Watch me paint the sky with a stroke of fiery decadence

Quench the sorrow on my lips until I’m smoke

And I call out to you.

My love, shall we entangle in this crazed lunar dance together?

No one else understands me.

Hold my hand as I shed my insanity. Keep me strong.

Pull me into a celestial emerald sea

To emerge cleansed,